Being able to ‘go the distance’ in the bedroom is something that many men aspire to do. The sad reality is that some men struggle to last longer than a few minutes. Frustration builds with each failed attempt and it can be hard to break the cycle. One can develop shame and trauma about being embarrassed. For most, the idea of talking about it is too much.
Fortunately, there are some key positions and techniques that can help men delay ejaculation. In this guide, we’ll look at the best positions that can improve your bedroom stamina, as well as other methods that can help you extend your love-making.
Top 5 Best Sex Positions To Last Longer In Bed
Discover the best sex positions to help improve sexual performance and last longer in bed.
Cowgirl
The cowgirl position gives you a great chance to take a break and let your partner do the work.
First things first, get comfortable. You can either lie flat on your back or sit up with your back against a wall or headboard. Then, have your partner straddle you, facing you, and lower herself onto your member. Her knees need to be planted on either side of her hips.
You can use your hands to help stimulate her breasts or even gently guide her hips to find the perfect angle. You can tell your partner to slow down in order to reduce the stimulation. If necessary, you can use your hands to hold onto her hips and regulate her movements.
With cowgirl, your partner is in the driver’s seat, meaning she can control the pace, depth, and intensity of the action. The sex position allows her to grind against your pelvic bone, which can stimulate her clitoris in a way that most other sexual positions just can’t match.
It’s a win-win situation: she gets the pleasure, and you get a break.
If you’re feeling adventurous, try out reverse cowgirl or reverse missionary. In these sexual positions, your partner faces away from you, which can be an exciting change of pace.
Missionary Outercourse
To try this position, start in the traditional missionary position with your partner lying on her back and you on top. But instead of thrusting in and out, lean over her body when she’s lying flat and place your penis between her labia. This creates a tight and wet seal that will drive you both wild.
From here, it’s all about the grind. Rub your penis against her clitoris, giving her the direct and intense stimulation she craves. This will make her feel amazing while also keeping you in control of your own arousal.
You can also experiment with rubbing your bodies together in different ways, like by shifting your hips, moving your pelvis in a figure-eight motion, or having your partner squeeze her legs together to create more friction.
What makes this position truly special, though, is the intimacy it creates. You and your partner are face-to-face, with your bodies pressed together. You can kiss, touch, and whisper sweet nothings to each other. Think about how you can stimulate each other physically and mentally.
The Reverse Doggy Style
Doggy style is a classic position that many men love because of its sheer pleasure. However, it can also be a one-way ticket to early ejaculation! That’s where the reverse doggy comes in — it’s the intimate position that gives you all the satisfaction but lets you stay in the driver’s seat.
To get into this sex position, start off with regular doggy style in a kneeling position. When you start to feel that familiar pressure building up, switch things up to keep your engine running.
Lower your partner down until they’re lying flat on their belly and your stomach presses the top of their back. It’s like you’re in missionary, only she’s flipped over.
There are a few ways to work this position to your advantage. You can start by grinding against your partner instead of thrusting. This will allow you to maintain contact and build up more tension without getting too excited.
If you’re feeling brave and want to take things up a notch, you can try slow thrusting in and out. This will require some self-control, but it will also allow you to experience a different kind of pleasure that’s both intense and prolonged.
Spooning
Spooning is not only a cozy and comfortable position to snuggle in but also a great option to help in delaying ejaculation.
To get started, lie on your sides with your partner facing the same direction as you. Position yourself behind her, with her back snuggled against your chest, just like a pair of spoons. You’ll want to take your time with initial penetration since it can be tricky to navigate in this position. Have your partner lift her top leg to make it easier for you to access her, and use your fingers to guide yourself in.
Once you’re in, focus on grinding against her. This way, you can control the pace and rhythm while enjoying the deep penetration. With spooning, you won’t have to worry about overstimulation since the penetration is shallow. This means you can last longer and savor every sensation.
Spooning also offers a fantastic opportunity for intimacy and connection with your partner. You can feel each other’s heartbeats and breathing, making the experience even more intimate and romantic. The closeness and warmth create a sense of security, comfort, and trust between partners, making it a perfect choice for those looking to strengthen their emotional bond.
Lotus
This position is perfect for when you need to take a little break from all the crazy in-and-out thrusting but still want to feel deep penetration.
Here’s how it works: you sit up with your legs crossed in front of you (no, you don’t have to be a yoga master to do this). Then, your partner sits on your lap, facing you, and wraps her legs around your back.
From here, you two just grind against each other. It’s a different motion from regular thrusting, but it’s just as pleasurable – if not more so. The Lotus position is great for when you need to catch your breath during a steamy sex session. Close physical contact can be really intimate and can feel amazing.
Tips to Improve Endurance During Sex
There are a lot of over-the-counter and prescription medications or treatment options available to help you last longer. Below are some extra tips that can help you increase your sexual stamina, so you can last longer and experience greater pleasure:
Try Pelvic Floor Exercises
The pelvic floor is the group of muscles that support your bladder, bowels, and sexual organs. Strengthening this area and undergoing pelvic floor muscle rehabilitation has been found to increase ejaculation control, eliminate erectile dysfunction, and help men last longer in bed.
One of the most popular exercises to strengthen your pelvic floor muscles is called Kegel exercises. This exercise consists of squeezing and releasing the muscles around the base of your penis multiple times in a row for 10-15 seconds at a time. Think about the muscles you squeeze together when you try to stop a pee stream.
Doing this several times a day will help you become more aware of how your body responds during sex, allowing you to better control yourself when it’s time to climax.
Improving Cardiovascular Health
You might be surprised that a good cardio workout can help you last longer in bed. That’s because having better cardiovascular fitness gives your body more stamina and endurance, which is useful for lasting longer during sex. Improved cardiovascular health also helps reduce fatigue, allowing you to stay energized throughout the session.
The best way to improve your cardiovascular fitness is through regular aerobic exercises such as jogging, biking, or swimming. You should aim to do at least 30 minutes of aerobic exercise 3-5 times per week. This will not only help improve your overall heart health but will also give you greater physical endurance in the bedroom.
Masturbation
Masturbation can help lower overall arousal levels and make it easier to stay in control when things heat up. It resets your ejaculatory threshold and provides a head start for lasting longer in bed.
The refractory period, or the time between orgasms, can vary from person to person. While some people may need longer breaks, others can jump back into action in a matter of minutes. This is why it’s important to experiment and see what works best for you.
Use Desensitizing Condoms and Sprays
Desensitizing condoms tend to contain benzocaine, which numbs the nerve endings in your penis. This means that when you ejaculate, it takes longer for the sensation of pleasure to reach your brain – enabling you to last longer in bed.
Desensitizing sprays and creams can also be used alone or with a condom to amplify the effect. These products can be sprayed directly onto your penis before penetrative sex, and their effects will last up to 15 minutes.
The Squeeze Technique
The technique involves applying pressure or squeezing the head of the penis for a few seconds before ejaculation. This helps to delay orgasm and gives you more control over when you climax.
To use this method, start masturbating until you’re almost ready to ejaculate. Then, stop the stimulation and press your thumb and forefinger against the base of your penis for about 10 seconds. This will help stop your ejaculatory reflex and delay your orgasm. You can then resume stimulation after 10 or 20 seconds and repeat the process.
Prioritize Foreplay
Foreplay is an essential part of a healthy sex life. It helps to create anticipation and excitement, and it can be used to make sexual intercourse last longer. The type of foreplay you do will depend on your individual preferences and those of your partner.
Here are some tips for making the most out of foreplay:
- Experiment with different types of touch. From gentle caresses to light massages, exploring different types of touch can add variety and keep things interesting.
- Talk about what feels pleasurable. Don’t be afraid to communicate with your partner about what feels good, as this will help increase sexual pleasure for you and your partner.
- Spend more time in areas not typically associated with sex. Paying extra attention to areas such as your partner’s neck, back, and feet can prolong foreplay and help you last longer in bed.
- Take breaks if necessary. If things are getting too intense or the pleasure is overwhelming, take a break and focus on something else for a few moments before resuming activity.
By making foreplay an important part of your sexual repertoire, you can add variety and intensity to your sex life while also lasting longer in bed.
Stop-start Technique
This technique involves engaging in sexual stimulation until you feel that you’re close to ejaculating, at which point you immediately pause and relax the muscles of your pelvic floor.
When you feel that the sensation has decreased, you can then resume sexual activity until you reach the point of climax again. By repeating this process multiple times in different sex positions, you can learn to gain control over your ejaculation and extend your time in bed.
Knowing the Enemy: The Low-Down About Premature Ejaculation
Premature ejaculation has a worldwide prevalence of approximately 30%. This makes it a fairly common sexual dysfunction out there and affects men of any age. This disorder is diagnosed when a man cannot control his ejaculation or orgasms too early.
It can be caused by psychological issues i.e. anxiety, depression, or stress. It is also linked to physiological causes such as hormonal imbalances, thyroid issues, or prostate cancer.
Premature ejaculation can be lifelong or acquired. Men who have lifelong premature ejaculation usually experience early and have a hard time holding back climaxes since the beginning of their sexual life.
On the other hand, acquired premature ejaculation occurs due to psychological issues or changes in the man’s life, such as relationship problems, a new partner, or a medical condition.
Having an occasional episode of premature ejaculation shouldn’t be a cause for alarm, but recurrent episodes could lead to more severe issues such as:
- Low self-esteem
- Difficulty in maintaining a relationship
- Avoidance of sexual encounters
- Performance anxiety
- Unsatisfactory sexual experience for both partners
The good news is you could get some help. Some quick fixes can help you extend your time in bed and have a more enjoyable sexual experience with your partner.
Final Word on Best Position To Last Longer in Bed
At its core, lasting longer in bed is about learning to better understand and control your body. When you can identify signs of impending orgasm, you can take a break or switch positions to prevent it from happening. This is the key to lasting longer and it’s much easier than you might think.
The positions we’ve mentioned above can help you extend your sexual session, as they can provide improved control and allow for slower, more intimate sex. Experiment with them to find which works best for you and your partner.
